Hondattitude

I finally finished working on the Honda Accord.

Time to get back to Real Life (aka The Basement).

And sleep.

But first, I want to bore you to tears with a long-winded explanation of the "fun" I've been having with this little project.

It belongs to a friend of mine who was given the car by her grandparents in order to have transportation to/from work and school (college). But it had a little problem. Something was leaking. Knowing I'm a bit of a car geek, she asked me to take a look at it. Which I did.

Turns out, it had not one leak, but two.

First, some idiot had replace the oil drain plug with a "universal" plug that works kind of like a toggle bolt.  You know, the stupid things people put in drywall to hold up cabinets and mirrors instead of using a stud like a normal person. The problem with these universal plugs, from what I've read on-line (very recently, because I'd never heard of them before) is that they tend to loosen over time due to the fact that the metal cross-piece inside the oil pan bends, so it has to be re-tightened occasionally. And then one must be careful not to overtighten, which can break off the cross-piece and leave it inside the oil pan.

I was afraid that it had been installed because the idiot ruined the threads of the original plug, but my fears were unfounded. One new Honda-certified oil pan drain plug later ($4.99 from AutoZone) and the oil leak is no more!

Second, the power steering fluid reservoir was nearly empty. I purchased some fluid and filled up the reservoir, then started the car to see what would happen.

It leaked.

Specifically, the high-pressure steering pump output hose was leaking at the metal/rubber joint. This is typical of power steering hoses. Because joining metal and rubber in a high-pressure hydraulic line is a tricky thing, and the metal joint which has been clamped around the rubber eventually loses its grip on the rubber and the fluid starts coming out.

Honda had the part for $400.  The local shop was willing to put it in for an additional $400. I balked. Especially when I found the part on-line for $30. And I thought I could handle the job of getting the silly hose off the car.

All I had to do, was to remove 4 bolts and the flare nut on the steering column.

The first two bolts were easy. Right out in the open, on top of the steering pump. Easy-peasy.

The next two bolts were extremely difficult. Because they were the bolts which clamped the metal hydraulic line to the framing cross-piece under the car. Between the engine and the frame. With no room for any tools or hands to reach.  The only way to reach either one, in fact, was to remove all the extraneous hoses, lines, and couplings from the back side of the engine in order to make enough room for hands and tools.

After a couple days of back-breaking effort, I managed to get both of the clamping bolts off.

Then it was time for the flare nut, which was also impossibly located between the engine and the framing cross-piece. With barely enough room to get a tool on it, but not enough room to get a tool with an extension on it.

There was absolutely no room to manuever back down there; and though I tried a flare wrench and a clenching wrench and even a pair of vise grips, it was no dice. The nut was too rusted to budge (even after four or five doses of lubricant), and there was no way I could get proper leverage on it. And my greatest fear was that the nut or the hose would snap off, and then I would have to take the entire steering mechanism apart.

So I cleaned up what I could, put the new part in the trunk of the car, and gave the car back to the young lady, with instructions to take the car to the best mechanic she could find, and see if they'd be willing to put the part on for her.

{Most shops will not install parts they did not obtain themselves, which is why I instructed her to talk to them first. In my experience, many shops have a bad habit of overcharging for parts. It would be very nice if she could find one that was willing to only charge her for the labor to install it.}

And that was the end of my Honda Adventure.

And Lord help me if I ever touch a Honda again. That was the stupidest, anti-maintenance design I've ever worked on. Routing the power steering line through inaccessible crevices is just mean.

The only way to remove the hydraulic line properly would require removal of the engine as a prerequisite.

Had it been my car, with unlimited time, that is what I would've done. And I would've cleaned up all the rusted parts along the way.

But not today.