A family is grieving today.
A young man who had everything to live for, is no longer living. And the circumstances surrounding his death are the type that cause parents to hold their breath in sympathetic horror.
Sudden Infant Death syndrome is bad enough, a tragedy that should never occur to anyone, devastating beyond understanding, calling to mind all the unspeakable terrors which build up within the minds of a young couple as they are beginning a family.
Sudden Young Adult Death Syndrome - if there was such a thing - is, in my mind, far worse, for it takes away the hopes and dreams of a family who have spent nearly eighteen years watching their young son or daughter growing up, achieving, failing, persevering, overcoming, astounding, going above and beyond all expectation of success and taking it all away in a single, unguarded, unimagined moment.
Had he been involved in something dangerous or reckless or illegal, it would have made some kind of sense and there would have been an answer to the question of "Why?" in the mind of the parents.
But when all he did was go to bed, what answer is there to be found?
The medical examiner said he had an "enlarged heart"; that is, one of the chambers of his heart was thicker than normal, which, although difficult if not impossible to detect, would have led to a number of issues resulting in heart failure. It functioned well enough for nearly eighteen years; why stop now?
This young man was a superb athlete, a good scholar, well-liked, active in his church, and about to take an appointment to either West Point or the Naval Academy. There was everything to look forward to.
Every untimely death is a tragedy, no matter the cause; but this one resonates in my mind because as I imagine myself in that circumstance, I see myself looking through all the old photo albums, seeing the things that my children encountered year by year, the things they learned, the way they grew, the joys they experienced, the tears they cried, the hugs we gave them -- and I wonder, Why now? Why did he have to go now, after all those things he survived, all those years he grew larger and smarter and more capable of handling life in the real world, all those years he built up a set of skills and talents which he was supposed to use to go out there and make this world better?
Where is the sense in that?
There is no sense in that. There are only questions. And the only answer is, God knows. Yes, He knows now, but we won't know for a long time - if ever, at least during our time here on earth - and there is very little of earthly comfort to be gained from the knowledge that it doesn't matter if you are good, bad, or ugly; your very good, very smart, very capable child could die in the night without ever giving a hint of a condition that there is anything wrong with them.
How is a parent to sleep at night knowing these things?
A young man who had everything to live for, is no longer living. And the circumstances surrounding his death are the type that cause parents to hold their breath in sympathetic horror.
Sudden Infant Death syndrome is bad enough, a tragedy that should never occur to anyone, devastating beyond understanding, calling to mind all the unspeakable terrors which build up within the minds of a young couple as they are beginning a family.
Sudden Young Adult Death Syndrome - if there was such a thing - is, in my mind, far worse, for it takes away the hopes and dreams of a family who have spent nearly eighteen years watching their young son or daughter growing up, achieving, failing, persevering, overcoming, astounding, going above and beyond all expectation of success and taking it all away in a single, unguarded, unimagined moment.
Had he been involved in something dangerous or reckless or illegal, it would have made some kind of sense and there would have been an answer to the question of "Why?" in the mind of the parents.
But when all he did was go to bed, what answer is there to be found?
The medical examiner said he had an "enlarged heart"; that is, one of the chambers of his heart was thicker than normal, which, although difficult if not impossible to detect, would have led to a number of issues resulting in heart failure. It functioned well enough for nearly eighteen years; why stop now?
This young man was a superb athlete, a good scholar, well-liked, active in his church, and about to take an appointment to either West Point or the Naval Academy. There was everything to look forward to.
Every untimely death is a tragedy, no matter the cause; but this one resonates in my mind because as I imagine myself in that circumstance, I see myself looking through all the old photo albums, seeing the things that my children encountered year by year, the things they learned, the way they grew, the joys they experienced, the tears they cried, the hugs we gave them -- and I wonder, Why now? Why did he have to go now, after all those things he survived, all those years he grew larger and smarter and more capable of handling life in the real world, all those years he built up a set of skills and talents which he was supposed to use to go out there and make this world better?
Where is the sense in that?
There is no sense in that. There are only questions. And the only answer is, God knows. Yes, He knows now, but we won't know for a long time - if ever, at least during our time here on earth - and there is very little of earthly comfort to be gained from the knowledge that it doesn't matter if you are good, bad, or ugly; your very good, very smart, very capable child could die in the night without ever giving a hint of a condition that there is anything wrong with them.
How is a parent to sleep at night knowing these things?
1 comment:
A parent's nightmare.
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